5 Foolproof Ways To Overcome Doubts And Boost Your Confidence As A Freelancer

It doesn't matter what service or product you offer I would bet money on the fact that at some point in your journey, you have felt the overwhelming feeling of self-doubt and insecurity...

You're going along, doing your thing, rocking your work, killing it with sales and suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere, someone makes a comment and you're confident exterior crumbles into a basket of nerves.

Then all of the insecurities you've fought so hard to get through and overcome just burst through the surface... Even ones that have nothing to do with the original comment.

Have I hit the nail on the head?

Guilty. Been there.

Everyone feels this way... But that thought isn't very comforting when you're in the midst of losing your mind wondering if you should just throw in the towel and give it all up.

But while it's a totally normal thing and it's okay to feel those emotions it doesn't mean you need to sit around and let those emotions take control of the situation. That just leads you down a messy road and there is no way you are giving up on your dreams my friend!

So, here are 5 ways to overcome your doubts and insecurities and boost your confidence so you can continue killing it:

1. Keep an accomplishments list

This is a preventative solution. Start this right now whether you're feeling the insecurities and imposter syndrome or not. Dedicate a notebook as your wins notebook. Every time you accomplish something, you reach a goal or part of a goal or you have a great win, big or small, write it down in this book.

Then when these nasty situations come up open your wins book and read a bunch and remind yourself what a badas* you are. Having someone else tell you how awesome you are is great but being able to tell yourself (through your own accomplishments) is even better! Much more powerful.

2. Give yourself some space (and grace) to work through your emotions

All emotions serve a purpose. We cannot just keep them bottled up inside of us and push on through pretending everything is good. That is what we like to call toxic positivity. And here's the thing...

Bottled-up emotions, when enough pressure is applied, will eventually come spilling out anyway. When they are forced out everything is released with so much intensity it can become incredibly overwhelming. 

Negative comments can be a hard blow and your mind can be your own worst enemy but it's better to sit with your emotions and feel them when they happen so you can deal with them and move on than always keeping them right below the surface ready to blow at the least opportune time.

3. Give yourself some space from the particular project in question

It's much better to just give yourself a break. It doesn't have to be long but get up and physically leave the space, the project and the person for a moment. You're full of emotions and if you keep trying to work on the project while also trying to feel your emotions you'll end up not doing your best work and giving more validation to that comment.

Step away and try to work on something else (or take an actual break) for a little while, while the emotions are felt and deescalate. You can come back to it later but right now is not that time.

4. Get yourself an easy win

While you're on a break go find yourself an easy win. Work on a project you know you can do or you're already confident with. Something simple, quick and that will still give you high satisfaction that will send a message to your brain, "See, I got this."

When you go back and finish the project that caused the insecurity (if it's not already done) you'll go into it with a renewed confidence and determination to prove your naysayer wrong.

5. Take this as a lesson

Boundaries and saying no are important. Everything in life is a lesson; the good and the not-so-good. This can too. If you're someone who doesn't get a lot of negative feedback it can feel really jarring and out of the blue to receive some.

If you know that the comment doesn't have merit then take this as a lesson about what kind of client you'd like. Look for these red flags in any prospective clients and don't be afraid to say no if you see similar personality traits.

If the comment does have merit learn from it. It doesn't mean it doesn't still hurt when you hear it but take it as a lesson on how you can improve your own services. Say thank you for the feedback, part ways if that's needed and improve that area for the next client. But don't hold onto it like it's the scarlet letter. Move on and learn.

Self-doubt, insecurity and imposter syndrome are completely normal and, frankly, inevitable, feelings that you'll probably face (or have already faced) as a freelancer. Some people will absolutely love you while others won't. This is the way of the world. How you handle the ones who aren't a fan will determine how they respond.

If you freak out, chances are they'll end up with a nasty review, getting stiffed on a payment and potentially some bad blood spilled which could negatively impact future business. If you react calmly and with respect, they may simply be grumpy with you and then drop.

You cannot control them but you sure as heck can control you.